Because you presumably can’t hit a major-league curve. I’ll give you that. Not that I’ve tried, but I’m betting I can’t hit a major-league curve, either. (Now a nasty slider…)
The larger, less-literal point I make in the latest episode of Former Child Star Central is that Alex Rodriguez, the baseball star-turned-scored PED user-turned baseball star anew, is doing something that Justin Bieber, the pop star-turned-joke, should do. (Hint: It’s not getting kicked out of Coachella.)
Elsewhere, I invent the Former Child Star Central Book Club, and highly recommend that Lindsay Lohan heed its first selection, Amber Tamblyn‘s Dark Sparkler.
Yes, I’m just full of advice. Or something like that.